One of Those Days

It's always bound to be a bad day, the day after Sunday. The rain outside today is clearly a symbol of the kind of day I'm prepared to have. Every time Sunday comes, I seem to be depressed for the next 2 days at least. I have no idea why, Sundays just suck I guess. Mondays do, too.

This one in particular is no different than the previous two for me, but if you don't know what I've been through lately, you wouldn't know what I meant by that. Keep in mind, I know that this is NOT a major crisis, or the "end of the world," or anything like that. But I'm forced to respond to it like it is because I'm way too emotional for my own good. Anyways, this mostly has to do with a break-up I recently experienced. This one in particular has been the hardest on me of all of them. I say this because I had strong, genuine feelings for this girl. She even knew I was Autistic, and was completely understanding and supportive about it.

So why did something so seemingly perfect have to end so abruptly? My only conclusion is that the whole thing was a lie, and that the whole thing was completely one-sided. This conclusion both DOES and DOES NOT make any sense to me. What I don't understand is why it had to stop. We had never argued one time, even in having been together for almost 3 months, we got along so well, we could talk about anything, we were always there for each other, and we just felt so compatible.

After this break-up, my hope had been crushed for a while. Then, when I FINALLY almost feel fine with everything, Sunday has to come around and ruin everything. Now I'm back to the thought that I shouldn't sit at the table I usually do (where she sits right next to me, causing me intense awkwardness), because I "just take up space." I shouldn't have to think this way EVER, but I sadly have no choice. This is my life.

Anyways, I just needed to vent, I guess. I feel I should more often talk about how I feel, and show how it's stronger for me than most others.